i forgot about this thing

Holy crap its been forever since i have been on this thing! I totally forgot about it! Things have been going AMAZINGLY good! Mat has had a rough year though! he will get a job and then they have the dumbest excuse as to why they dont need him to work there anymore. But thank goodness he is now HIRED IN a place now! We defiantly needed this relief... I am still going to cosmetology school and still loving it! Cody is getting so darn big its unreal! i love him with all my heart. he has been saying the darn est of things. for example he will see a girl on tv and run up to me and say "MOM ITS MY GIRLFRIENDS..." he is a hoot. Pretty much everything is going amazing right now and i wouldn't wanna change anything for anything!

We have been in Mississippi now for a week... we spent christmas here! Mats mom and step dad moved here in February so we came to visit. it was super fun! i can actually post the pictures. We were really excited for no snow on Christmas. haha.. we are not fans of michigan winters! We went bowling with mats cousins the monday or tuesday after christmas... it was a blast! Well other than that! i hope everyone has a safe and happy new year =)

wow

Wow it sure has been forever!!! things are going good! mat just got a awesome job!!! cody is getting sooo big! i have been attending school of designing arts and i loveee it! i am on a leave right now cuz mats car broke down so we have to save up some money so i am going to try and get a part time job to get that fixed!!! we are working on painting our place!!! havent completely started yet but we already got the paint!!!! just have to get the walls sanded down and then primed i am sooo excited... Codys 2nd birthday in in a little over a month i cant believe he really is about to be two =/ he is getting sooo smart... he tells me how he feels about everything... example.... he wakes up one morning and says mom where dad? and i say he had to go see your uncle josh (who is in jail) and he said ohhh noo call nana... so i said okay... ( i called my mom) and cody says nana dad josh and my mom says oh yah and cody says hurrrryyy.... haha... he loves his uncle josh! he just recently went to jail for getting way drunk and being a dumb a$$ but he gets out on sept 18th! so cody is going to be super happy! I had surgery on July 28th! i had a golf ball sized scar tissue on my uterus... pretty painful! the surgery went really good and i am still a little sore where the incisions are but ill be all good here soon! there really isnt anything else going on just finally excited things are starting to look up again for us! i hope this time they stay up!! ha...

I forgot about this thing!!!!

Things have been superrrr GOOOD... No fights... nothing... Cody is growing up wayyyyy to fast!!! Mat got a job at walmart... well not working for walmart, its under manpower moving the store around... i am going to back to school on july 6th... im proud that i chose to go back now instead of september cuz if i go now then i wil graduate SOOOONER... well cody has decided he doesnt wanna nap so i have to get off here as soon as iget back to internet ill post more... just know EVERYTHING is finally going goood =D

things were good then went bad

oh my so things were going so good.. smooth and easy... then BAM WTH??? i go to my drs to try and get on meds for my ADHD so i can focus a little more in school and she says u need to make a appt at summit point and make sure its nothing else. WTF ever man.. so i get in there and they start making me remember the past gets me all depressed. then we go and try and get a house and they tell us your credit has to be a min of 620 okay thats cool well my credit score is 561!!!! WHY WHY WHY did i let this get so bad? i have been crying the past two days i feel like such a failure! why would i do this to myself??? and not just to myself my kid! he cant have a super nice house or a backyard that he can play in.. i am over it. sick and tired of this... I cant wait for this to be over with!!!

SHIT

Sunday we get a phone call... this is what is said... "Mat u owe me money for the system i let u buy off me. ur supposed to be my brother and not screw me over." so what does mat say?? this is it--> "Josh i aint got it right now" Josh says: "Well where are u at?" Mat; "Im in kalamazoo for a birthday parrty for cody" Josh: "Kay well then im on my way to ur house and ima steal your laptop and all kinds of shit in your house to get my money back" HAHA mother f(_)cker we were home... So he comes in MY house and tries telling me i owe him money and all sorts of crap and i am like "Josh i dont owe u sh!t... i sure as heck didnt getnothing from u, i didnt even want them speakers in either of our cars so to me idc... but i know I dont owe u anything" and so here he goes... " Oh yah bitch leave your house and i am going to steal that pretty laptop of yours and bust your stuff and blah blah blah..." So i say "okay go ahead... im not effing scared.. go ahead take it... as a matter of fact take itnow.." does he?? No cuz i wasnt playing i was heated i felt my body get hot.. so... he gets mad cuz i told him keep threatening me and ill call the cops... So he gets mad cuz i said i was going to call the cops swung my door open and breaks my railing on the steps and says "Bitch ima kick your ass" and all this crap talk... so mat gets up and says leave josh get off my property... well i am not liking the way cody is freakingout (yes he did this is my house with my child sitting rt there who doesnt EVER see violence) so i called the cops. yupp i did cuz this is my property and i have EVERY right! so after i tell him im on the phone with the cops he kicks my porch door and bust it. then picks up codys sit n spin that was outside (its a outside toy that sits two people in it big remind u) and throws it at my house. almost busting my windows... I WAS TICKED after this. i gave the cops all his info... i was ready for his ass to go to jail.. damn they didnt do shit cuz he wasnt here anymore... =/ SOOO after all that he comes and does like 5 donuts on my front road and ruins our yard... almost hits my car in drive way... ugh i hate him i really do i hate him... so tonight we get a phonecall at midnight "MAt i need some money i know its on ur card." SOOO MAt gets outta bed and goes to the atm?? WTF!!!! i am heated. and whocares cuz i aint no one... WHY cant josh get a job and take care of his own life? grow the fuck up why is baby brother taking care of u?? where are ur kids? why arent u taken care of them??? this is rediculous... i cant take it anymore. he is about to get a ppo so he cant come around here anymore. cuz this is ruining mine and mats relationship. whether or not mat owes him money we have RENT coming up! bills that have shut off notices... and cars with barely any gas in them! i am overrr it... yup i am...

we will see how long it last cuz i am not doing this anymore. Josh needs to get off his ass and be a man he thinks he is.. cuz he isnt to me.. he is a little boy

my first saturday class

So i had my first Saturday class and i was supperrrrrr nervous when i got there. My stomach got all gargly lol is that a word? But anyways i got in there didnt know what to do, walked around for a sec looking for the teacher! Well she comes in finally and says welcome this is what we are doing and then again i am like WTH? i dont understand whats going on everyone walks down to the floor and okay they are doing roll call. Well she calls a Jessica and i amlike me? im here.. and EVERYONE was looking at me. They werent even talking about me and i made a fool of myself. When they do roll call u tell them if u are going to be there all day or half day idk what to say no one tells me... lol.. well thats all over and i go back and work on my perm i was doing and she tells me i need to do theory withthem.. okay well i have already done haircolor BUT mrs bonnie SUCKS at teaching and when Ms Char was explaining stuff i understood so much more. altho before i got a 91% on my haircolor test i still felt like i was missing out on stuff. i was glad i got tosit in on that! Well after that i go back into the class room and finish my perm and i did good. i need to work on my parting which i already knew. Well then i had to blow dry and then i learned how to go figure 6 curls which are pretty simple. got half a head done and i straightened her hair and learned how to do a french twist and updo with it... i loveeed it i was soo proud of myself. then i learned how to french braid.. it all turned out to be a good day. i wasnt so nervous after a while and i liked it alot. well thats pretty much it! i had NOTHING to be affraid of... altho there are a few girls in there who u could tell thought they were better than i was! O WELL BITCHES ull never be better than me =)

My ring....

Okay... So today for lunch we decided we wanted to go to ritzies or however u spell it?! and i was messing with mats tattoo and i noticed OH MY the diamond and prongs to my ring was MISSING... hollllllyyyy crap i called my Oma(grandma) and told her cuz she is the one who gave me the ring and she was like ohh its okay... NO its not okay! I thought life was over, i havent taken that ring off since i go it.. So thank god i came home and found it in our bed. I took it to Kings Jewelers just cuz he is awesome and i take all our stuff there and he said it will take a week to ten days to fix... and for only thirty dollars.. thankkkk the lord... i am sooo happy i found it... lol.. other than that i am LOVING this weather... i think spring is springing.. im keeping my fingers crossed =)

this is getting on my nerves

Okay so i know this isnt for all the negitive stuff but i am getting soooo sicka nd tired of things. Like to the point as to where i dont wannabe here anymore. OR he needs to get a job. so we arent spending all this time together. something. but he had 4 and a half hours to clean up the house and all he did was start a load of dishes in the dish washer. this house is still a huge mess. what do i look like a bitch? friday i am supposed to get a few things done but i thin i am going to go look for a job. i cant just sit here and feell ike this. i am not going to move far away from my family if i am not sure things are going to work. i dont wannt leave him cuz i love him so much but i am not going to live like this forever.

seriously

So its not my fault u want to stay up all night and do whatever it is u do,but when cody wakes up why cant u get up? why do i keep having to get up? ive been sick cant i sleep? ugh..

Well the sun is out i am NOT sitting inside all day. im take cody n we are going outside. =)

Oh my

Well i have never used a blogger thing and maybe it will make me feel better about things. Mostly if i can get things out without having to hear someone bitch to me about how i feel...

Well one: i am sooo tired of feeling like mat and i are constantly fighting. Why cant he just help me around the house? He isnt working either, so he has all day. all i want is when u start something for you to finish it, and try to keep it up. Thats why i am alway crabby... ugh jeez this does sorta work. I am feeling alittle better already.

Two: Why do kids grow up so fast? My child seems to be doing something new everyday. he now is starting to learn to blow his nose. lol its the cutest thing EVER!!! i cant help but stare at him all the time and just giggle. He is the BEST. I
NEVER knew u could love someone so much. He is saying so many different things its funny. he tries sooo hard to say things that make no sense. For example he will stand in the middle of the living room "talking on the phone" and its cute he is like ohh ahh nana mommm paci and all sorts of crap! I love it. I am soo excited that this summer he is going to be able to play outside and go for walks with mom and oh my he is getting soo big. ugh i am going to tear up...

Three: WHY DOES MY CAR SUCK?? i swear we are fixing this p.o.s every month. its always breaking down.

FOUR: I am going to Beauty school and i looovee it... i cant wait to graduate and be a hairstylest. i am doing so good. at first i felt like ugh why am i doing this i suck... but the more test i have done and the more things i have practiced on i am proud of myself.

Well thats all for now i am sure now i know how to use this thing ill be on here more... =)